Top 12 best English-Tagalog Jokes
The Lizards
There are 3 lizards the 1st lizard dance
How many lizards are left
.
.
There are 1 lizard left
Because the 2 lizards clapped
And fall!
The police and the child
Police: where do you live?
Child: with my family
Police: where does your family live?
Child: with me
Police: where do you all live?
Child: together
Police: where is your house
Child: near in our neighbor’s house
Police: where is your neibor’s house
Child: if I answer your question you’re
Not gonna believe me
Police: just answer me clearly and I will
Believe you
Child: near our house!
I can go home now!!
Teacher: whoever answer my question
First can go home
One boy threw a piece of paper
Teacher: who threw the paper!!??
Boy: Me!! I can go home now!
The two couples
Wife: honey,am I pretty or ugly?
Husband: same
Wife: what do you mean same
Husband: your pretty ugly!!
Wife: RAGE
The doctor and the patient
Doctor: I have good news and bad news
Patient: good news first
Doctor: you have 24 hours to live
Patient: whats the bad news
Doctor: the bad news as I forgot to tell you yesterday
Patient: I’m gonna die!!!
Uwak
Teacher: Juan i-english mo eto.
Juan: Wat mam?
Teacher: Ang uwak ay hinang-hinang naglakad
Juan: The wak wak weak weak wok wok.
No
Airforce: No guts, No glory!
Marines: No retreat, No surrender!
Army: No pain ,No gain!
Naks ayaw patalo ang….
Security Guards: No I.D, No entry!
BDO
Teacher: Class, what do you mean by BDO?
Student1: British Darts Organization
Student2: Banco de Oro
Student3: Binder Dijker Otte
Student4: Binder Hamlyn Offices
Peter raises his hand
Teacher: Yes, Peter?
Peter: BullDog Office, ma’am
Types of Martial Arts
Japanese: Judo
Korean: Taekwondo
Chinese: Kung Fu
Pinoy: Tak Bu
News Update:
Isang bus ang nahulog sa isang bangin
Subalit wala namang NASUGATAN sa mga NAMATAY!
Si Luhan
Isang araw may isang chinese na tinder
Yung “R” niya ay nagiging “L”
Sakto Bumili si Luhan.
Chinese: bili kayo may mangga,apple at olange.
Luhan: hello po, may pinya po ba kayo?
Chinese: melon.
Luhan: pinya po hindi melon.
Chinese: melon nga.
Luhan: pinya po.
Chinese: melon nga.
Luhan: pinya pinya pinya!
Chinese: melon melon melon!
Luhan: sige na nga melon na lang
Chinese: ay! Ubos na po.
ChenYeol
Chen: Pre may tanong ako sayo
Chanyeol: ano iyon pre?
Chen: 1+1 equals?
Chanyeol: sus yan lang pala eh.
Chen: o, sige nga? Ano ang sagot?.
Chanyeol: sus, Edi 3!
Chen: Hahahahaha
Chanyeol: o bakit ka tumawa?
Chen: kala ko kasi hindi mo alam.ahaha!!
